yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Randomize