Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
