jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
