I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
