I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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