I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
