Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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