Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
