Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
