Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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