Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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