As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
i out mim tonsoeep
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