bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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