Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
