I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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