I hate all girls vehemently.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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