so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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