I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize