I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
