Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
What a dumb baby whore.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
