: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Randomize
