New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
