I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
