Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
