It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
