just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
