can u get pink eye on your cock?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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