A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
it glows. i had to have it.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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