Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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