Quick, to the slutcave!
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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