I'm going to jail i love you
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
