when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
