i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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