I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
