Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
