Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
