i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
