Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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