We're facebook friends in real life
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
