I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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