So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I want her autograph on my taint
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Randomize