You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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