and next time when you feel me up, do it right
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
