Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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