Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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