He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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