so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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