She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
