My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
