Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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